I cried for along time tonight.
I cried so hard, I couldn't breath for a minute. I cried at the loss of his kindness and friendship. I cried that I hurt him and he hurt me. I cried at the loss of the man that I am in love with. Over because of incompatibilities and differences.
I know crying is cleansing. It is part of the grieving process in order to heal.
I will miss so many things about him and our relationship, and I can't expound too much out of respect for him. He is private and he reads this. All I know is that my heart feels this loss and by crying I am human, vulnerable and it shows how much I cared about him.
I now turn to another man for comfort
"I will not leave you comfortless. I will come to you." John 14:18
Someday I will be in a happier place, where I don't have to experience this pain so deeply, and what seems like so frequently. I can now run to the Lord for His healing.
"And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away." Revelation 21: 4.